seriously

somethings weighing heavily on my heart. 

a need. a lacking.

i'm talking about newly married women here. 

yes newly married couples, yet i am a woman so i am most aware of my 'wifely' experiences. 

i think there should be a support group. a ministry in the church.
koinonia mentorship specifically between 

a woman who's been married for longer coming alongside a newly engaged/married woman.

one that purposes to reach out to a woman BEFORE she get's married, during the engagement season.

a relationship that would involve authenticity. transparency. honesty. accountability. depth.

freedom to share what we are feeling, struggling with. a listening ear.
no pat responses.

i can not even begin to count how many times i hear or read about women sharing that the first year of marriage was the hardest, worst, most difficult. and how alone in it all they felt.

i am the gurl who wanted nothing more than to be a wife! spent years preparing. 

would yell at the tv shows that belittle men. 

where the wife would treat him so horribly and say how i would never be like that!

i really believe[ed] i was to be a wife.

a year and some months later, i am still sorting through all these conflicting feelings and struggles. disappointment over feeling like this. that being a wife didn't come as easily to me as i thought it would/should.

and i would hazard a guess that men need the same thing. perhaps in a different way, yet the same. 

why people leave the newly married couple alone is beyond me. 

yeah, don't call them on their honeymoon but come on! nothing for months afterwards?! 

seek them out! check in with them! ask them how they are doing! 

i don't know exactly how this looks, yet our Lord has revealed so much to me through this year. 

seeing this need, i want to do something about this.

we need to do something about this.